Life And Hope
What happens when a young lady wakes up one day with a metallic tongue? Everything that I ate tasted the same from water to solid foods and the smell of food had started smelling like some like garbage pit.
A few days later, I confided in a friend of mine, who advised me to go see a doctor because by that time, I could hardly hold any food in my stomach. I took her advice and went to the doctors. I was sent to the laboratory and a number of tests were done. When the tests were out, I was called in to see the doctor who informed me that I was expectant. Ok, I had seen family and friends go through pregnancy, I had seen some suffer morning sickness and all manner of hormonal imbalances, then I realized that the motherhood journey can only be experienced and not discussed theoretically on a boardroom table.
Some days were normal but some days I felt like I was carrying someone else’s body, the journey had just began. Nausea, fatigue and all were part of my first trimester and by the end of it some physical changes had started taking place. By week 15, my body was beginning to settle, my stomach was re-learning to handle the food, that tasted like fodder; The monthly visits to the clinic were helpful as thanks to my doctor who helped me with my diet and how to manage the blandness nature that my tough had suddenly acquired.
One day I woke and I had a splitting headache my body was feeling different. When I got out of bed, I noticed that I had a awkward walking style, I felt a funny strain on my lower abdomen, I called in sick at my workplace and proceeded to see a doctor. After a myriad of tests, the doctor informed me that my cervix was opening at 20 weeks of pregnancy and that I needed to be on bed rest until the issue resolved (in some cases the body self-heals and resolves). I was put on bed rest for a month. As daunting as that felt, I told myself that I was going to hack it, 4 weeks was not a very long time so I encouraged myself. Armed with a cocktail of medication and one particular one that would totally put me under, I would be lethargic and sick with palpitations.
I was on total bed rest and the only walking I was allowed to make was to go to the washroom and back to bed. I took the time to read a lot of books. I read all genres of books; it helped me ‘kill time’ so to speak.
By the end of the month the doctor gave me a clean bill of health, although I would have to stay back home, so I had to take leave from work. I was to take it as easy as easy can be. The following weeks went without much drama, my body was responding well, I was energized and I was grateful to God. By week 30 my stomach had grown to a very visible bump, I have a small body frame, so it took a while for the pregnancy to show.
But something strange happened, I started experiencing some abdominal pains, at the time I was staying with one of my sisters in law who is a nurse by profession, she advised me to go see a doctor. We got ourselves to hospital and after check-up, I was told that my cervices has opened again and the baby’s head had engaged, it meant that I needed to be admitted because, I would soon go into pre-mature labor.
It was an evening and before long I was being wheeled into the maternity ward. The doctor explained to me that he needed to inject some strong medication; so that it can help the baby’s lungs stabilize, since it is the last organ in an infant’s body that gets active. The lungs get activated when the newborn takes in oxygen.
I was taken through counseling and the horror stories of handling a pre-term baby were overwhelming. God speaks and his voice is very clear, as soon as the doctor left and it was my husband’s turn to leave, I heard God saying, ‘the blessing of the Lord makes rich and adds no sorrow to it’. I slept in peace knowing that God was in control.
That night, the maternity ward was busy, many things were happening, the particular ward that I was in, was for expectant mothers who were having trouble with their pregnancy. One particular woman had to go to the theater because her baby who she had carried to term had died in her womb, everyone in the ward could hear the commotion. It was very difficult for her, she had suffered serious preeclampsia. That night there were emergencies after emergencies, it was a busy night and the atmosphere in the hospital ward was very somber.
Since the doctors were expecting me to go into pre-term labor, I was being monitored hourly. Morning finally came and what a welcome relief. It was a general ward so I was sharing my cubical with 3 other ladies. One was suffering from fainting spells, another one had been in hospital for 3 months nursing a pre-mature baby, while the last one had a condition where her placenta was detaching, and it was a difficult time for the mother in the that ward.
I held on to the word the Holy Spirit had spoken to me the previous night, ‘the blessing of God makes rich and adds no sorrow with it’, my baby was a blessing from God and a blessing he was going to remain. By the afternoon it was clear that I was not going to give birth and so there was no need to keep me in hospital, I was discharged that evening with strict orders of TOTAL BED REST!
I would never wish total bed rest on anyone; i appreciated good health, mobility, and just one’s body being able to move even if it’s just an inch is a blessing not a right. I lay in bed for so long that every part of my body was sore; night times were a nightmare for me I was on bed rest for 10 weeks.
Since the baby had threatened to come earlier, anytime someone came to visit me the question would be ‘not yet’ I was asked that question so many times that I detested it. My pregnancy went through the full term 40 weeks! It was a Friday morning when I went into labor, I was driven to the hospital which was in the neighborhood so I was there in no time. The admission process went so fast and soon I was in the labor room by 7:00am I had already dilated 5cm. My dear husband was with me every step of the way; I needed someone to rub my back.
My labor was not as intense in fact I was named the smiling patient, at one point I could hear one nurse saying that when the labor will get intensive, it will wipe out the smile from my face. (I had heard so many horror stories on matters delivery, I purposed in my heart to learn from all quarters but also to shift information so I only picked what was beneficial to me). I waited for this unmanageable pain to come, fortunately it did not, some of the patients were going through their own moments and I could tell that it was not easy.
Around 12:00pm I was fully dilated and I was wheeled into the delivery room, the room was ready and the midwives were also ready to welcome new life. The infant’s head had already crowned but my baby was presenting his face, which I learnt was called rim presentation, at some point I got so tired of pushing that I told the nurses that I wanted to sleep! All this while my husband was by my side, I could hear the nurses discussing whether to prepare me for the theater. At some point my husband stood by the window, I could hear him praying silently.
A few minutes later the resident gynecologist randomly walked into the room and asked how things were going. I over-heard the nurse telling him that it was a rim presentation. He quickly prepped himself and told me to follow his instructions, within 2 minutes the baby was out, I was left wondering where he had been when I was wheeled in but I was grateful that he had walked in, for sure the Lord ordered his steps.
After all the medical procedures I was wheeled into the maternity ward to rest as the baby was being taken care of at the nursery. I had this overwhelming feeling, I was in awe of God, how he has so graced man to be able to bring forth another human being on the earth. I knew another phase of my life had begun and I was looking forward to walking with God who is the author and finisher of our faith.
CONCLUSION
There was nothing I did to carry the pregnancy to term, there are many who start the journey but did not finish not because they did anything wrong, I can not answer why people miscarry or go through abortion, but all I know is that the all knowing God knows, he is close to mothers who have lost their pregnancies, he alone can comfort in ways that no human being can.
Do not be afraid to get pregnant even after a loss, I have a friend who had 8 miscarriages, the struggle of not being able to carry pregnancy to term was taking a toll on her and her marriage, but today as I write, she has 3 children and they came in quick succession, I tell her that when God compensates, and he does it very well.
To all the mothers who have carried pregnancies to term and have their bundles of joy who are growing everyday, it is not what you did, not how careful you were, it’s not because you did everything right in the book, no, it is because of the goodness and the mercies of God. It is a privilege not a right.
No one absolutely no one can take credit except God.
